Maggie is one of my best friends and over the years we shared our secrets, our dreams, our fears, our joys and most of all we shared our love for each other. With Maggie it was never complicated. I never had to explain myself to her. She accepted me for who I was in the moment. We are all constantly changing and evolving as we mature and discover the laws of life and sometimes we can lose people along the way. There are many reasons for this, one being our spiritual convictions or perhaps our earthly perceptions. Sometimes people move in different directions or just grow apart. Somehow Maggie and I never collided in these matters. We enjoyed each other’s company, we enjoyed talking about the simple things in life and we laughed a lot when we were together.

When we both reached the age of fifty we marvelled at our timeless friendship. There had been many obstacles in our lives yet we agreed that if one can live half a decade and still laugh about it all then maybe we deserved the “good life” we were now enjoying! But this well-being was not to last. At the very young age of fifty-two Maggie was diagnosed with Alzheimer’s disease.

I had noticed a slight change in her behaviour. She appeared aggressive at times about insignificant details, dwelled on past events and was a bit forgetful but I assumed it was due to menopause. And, after all, age does bring on forgetfulness as well. But things worsened over a short period of time. Her family became so concerned that they insisted on medical consultation that only confirmed everyone’s worst fears.

Most of us today know the basic physical facts about Alzheimer’s disease but until we personally experience the anguishing effects on the lives of the people surrounding the patient, it is hard to understand. I loved this woman all of my life and now she barely recognized me, her husband and her children. We all suffered but deep inside I knew her suffering was probably greater. She knew that she was slowly losing contact with her world, with all that she knew, with all that she was. I felt her agony within the depths of my soul. So, I prayed for her release from this unbearable torture, as well as mine. God’s Love is ever watchful and in His great mercy I found solace and peace. Here is how it happened.

One day on my way to the care facility where she now resided, I walked by a small, empty lot that had filled up with daisies. I stopped for a moment to admire the beauty these simple flowers had created in this abandoned field. And in this moment I suddenly realized that Maggie too was like these daisies. Her mind might appear abandoned and empty but her spirit could still fill up the room just like these beautiful flowers.

We cannot always comprehend why seemingly bad things happen to good people. But I believe in the laws of Creation and I know that our existence is not only one earth life but many repeated lives, like chapters in a book. We reap what we sow and the reaping might only follow in a subsequent life so it is impossible to judge a situation from the perspective of our present life. Maggie’s illness was the result of actions that perhaps dated to former times. And all of the people who loved her and suffered through this with her had an opportunity to grow through our care for her, our compassion and our unconditional love for her. We could become her field of daisies.

Since that day, whenever I go visit with her, I bring a bouquet of daisies. She often has a detached, distant look in her eyes when I approach but as soon as she sees the flowers she smiles and says: “so pretty!” Her spirit is still very much alive! Love has no boundaries, no limitations and whatever the mills of life grind out for us, true love will uplift and encourage us and give us the strength to always keep our gaze on the lessons behind our greatest sufferings.

Deborah Soucie-Landers

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